Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Wearing MASK.....
This is definitely not an April Fool's Joke.
Who can really be Trusted???
It's really tiring & demoralised to be wearing a MASK everyday the moment you stepped out of your room.
Not only at work but also at home.
Can you imagine how pathetic life is if this is the Final Step that you got to take?
Each individual will definitely have their own life story & to be frank, it's very difficult for one to really understand, believe & know the real truth & feeling.
It's always the case that problems are created by people themselves. Ultimately some can be solved but not all.
Though there's this saying: When there's a Will, there's a Way!
Some people can even create a shield to protect the other showing only the GOOD but not BAD.
Well, most people tends to be blinded by one another.
My office used to be a carefree, relax working environment whereby work is done, targets are accomplished etc.
But the office nowadays had totally changed ever since our Boss started all the new measures.
He puts it in a very nice way: these measures are for our own good, to upgrade ourselves & see where we stand etc
But to me, that's just to track our movements & questioning our work cause he simply don't trust us.
The situation now is: Employees = Prisoners!
Tracked our in & out timing.
Tracked our break time.
Tracked our work quality.
Tracked our work quantity.
Banned all chatting websites & tools even for internal communications.
Lastly, uses all these including our working attitudes to appraise us & bring down our increment during Appraisal.
I've been working in this company for 6 years in June.
Though he adjusted my salary once last year before but insufficient.
Yes i might not have the qualification but comparing experience, i trained from scratch & can be on par with those who got so call background, i guess i'm more outstanding, isn't it?
Last year's increment was the most pathetic one that i ever get during all my years working in this company: a miserable amount of S$50!
Everyday reporting to work in fear, just like on a battlefield.
Right or wrong will end up in Boss's room one day.
Else all the office politics shooting one another here & there.
I'm a peacemaker yet everyday got to put on a fake front when facing people.
I hate making decisions as i'm an indecisive person rightfully.
How to be motivated with a situation like that in the office everyday?
Next is family.
I no longer feels any warmness in the family all because an outsider. Everyone just seems to be siding them to the extreme. Fine with me.
For the first time in my whole life, i actually feels sick to be home.
But its okay. I feel more peaceful in a way too.
I don't wish to talk, interact much with anyone. Preferred to be a mute that's why i wrote everything here.
I don't need anyone to act in front of me either.
As along as i have my room + my laptop, that's sufficient!
Everyone seems to be blinded by his bad & only see his good because she's always there to protect & cover the shits of his, creating a perfect image in front of everyone.
She might not understand that i'm actually feeling unjust for the way she's being treated ever since the night where i first witnessed how the whole incident happened.
From then onwards, i never have good impression for a person who's immature, childish & irresponsible whether can go how far in future.
Still i hope one day she'll know.
It's always better to depend on oneself than anyone else!
Maybe i should learned to be emotionless, feeling-less & heartless!
I guess at times when being forced by circumstances, being 绝情 or 六亲不认 is inevitable in order to survive in this society!
Maybe one day if i really attained such level, only then i can be a successful person!
^ Gerald ^
`[4/01/2008 11:45:00 PM]
